Uniquely Beautiful

I am sitting here watching TV and thinking about all that I have on my plate. I have started three new businesses on my own. It is something that has made me more confident. Being a business owner has made me so excited about the future. I am currently working full time at a behavioral health facility for children. I love it so much, the kids make it worth it. I do sit at home working on my businesses and I feel awful about that job. Working for someone else is something I have never been happy doing. I love being able to make my own schedule and work on my own time.

My mental health is something that has always been less than perfect. I have been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder after many years of uncertainty. I saw many therapists and doctors to get to that diagnosis. With a diagnosis like this, it is hard for me to have a full time job. I go through phases where I do not want to do anything. My depression can be so bad and the thought of having to be somewhere just feels awful. I will then go through these highs where I over schedule myself. I will pick up shifts at work and then later on regret it.

My entire life my anxiety has been super crippling. My body shakes and it feels like my skin is crawling. It always comes along with those depressive states. The thought of leaving the house becomes something I am anxious about. I feel nauseated and my body aches so badly. It all sounds so weird to people who have not experienced it but, it is my reality. This mental illness has brought to light the importance of starting my own business. It is something that can help me and my mental health. I know when I am on a high phase and I would be able to work super hard in those times. When I am depressed, I will have content to post for my businesses. For now, I work through my mental struggles and going to work. I have worked so hard in therapy to be able to go to work and do most things with this illness.

I have made this safe space for things like this. Conversations like these. These are the conversations that people need to be having with themselves and others in their lives. Start having these conversations. Figure out your relationship with your mental illness and your career. Figure out how your mental illness can effect any of your daily activities. Always remember that therapy is not a bad thing, medication is not a bad thing and that you are uniquely beautiful.